About the life of self realization

I don't know if it's awe or escape. I still don't want to admit that I'm thirty years old

Confucius said, "we stand at thirty!"! But in the past 30 years, I was like "wasting my life". Others were struggling, others were buying houses, others were getting married and others were having children. I didn't do any of these things. This year, my mind occasionally fantasized that I was young and still had physical strength. Even if I immersed myself in warm water, the programmer profession could make me at least 35, at least not make me "idle" now!

Speaking of "idleness", maybe it's my current state, but I don't think it's the best explanation, maybe it's my current state in the eyes of others! Living in other people's world, I can't convince myself that I'm not "wasting my life". This year, I didn't make a dime, and I've been doing what other people think is not important.

Ten years ago, when I entered the society, I began to think about what my life should be used for?

At the age of 20, I was confused and didn't know what I should do. I only knew that I liked playing computer games and kept a great interest in this aspect. Later, I worked hard to learn programming and finally entered the IT industry. At that time, I was so satisfied with my situation that I didn't worry about it for a long time.

With the growth of age and the change of social environment, people of the same age are facing the problems of marriage, having children and buying a house, so I have to face them! In the final analysis, these problems are still economic problems. To put it bluntly, we need to make money! In order to make money, I can only stay in the "grid" code, until the code out of a life?

I remember a few years ago, when I saw someone riding to Lhasa in Sichuan Tibet, I was very envious. Even going to Lhasa became a dream for me, but because of my work, I never had the chance to realize it. But this year, I went not only to Lhasa, but also to all over the country.

Cailin in Sichuan, lakes in Tibet, snow mountains in Ali and canyons in Xinjiang are all called "poisons", which lead me to fall in love with nature. They don't allow me to see them once, and I want to see them again. I want to record their most beautiful side, so I learned to take photos.

Later, in order to deal with the landscape photos I took, I taught myself the post photography. In order to find a place for them to show, I made my own website. I like travelling, and I also record and share my travel notes and travel strategies on the website.

Later, I have more ideas. Can I think about whether the website can carry all the ideas in my life, and can record all my experiences as a backup of my memory, and become the practice field of my skills and the diary of my life?

I have traveled through different regions, found different nationalities, different histories, different geography, different cultures, different values, and my interest in anything I touch with is worth learning and accumulating. With the development of vision and thinking, it will definitely make my mind more mature, more confident and more inclusive.

When I step into the embrace of nature, I find that preparing a climbing bag is enough for me to live for a few days, eating an apple will make me feel happy, and even the compressed biscuits are so delicious, and the acquisition of happiness is so simple, I find that desire can not be satisfied, and the desire trap of consumerism is endless!

Someone asked, "what's it like to have a rest for one or two years and go out to empty?"

My feeling is: everyone should strive to build a life, but also need to stop from time to time to think about what they really want, is not trapped in blind follow, but missed the scenery around